Decision Already Taken

The thought started from a dialogue from the Matrix trilogy. Neo (protagonist) goes to the Oracle who knows the future. He asks her, if she already knows that decision he is going to take, why give him choice. She says

You haven’t come here to know what to choose. You’ve already chosen. You came here to know why you chose it

That stuck to a corner in my brain for long. Another quote I read reignited that thought.

If you are confused between two options, flip a coin assigning an option to each side. As you flip and coin is in the air, your inner self lets out the option it wants. That’s the option you choose.

The fact that we already choose an option from bunch yet we go through the confusion, is fascinating and real. Let’s take an example as simple as picking between tea and coffee. The moment you see the options, you already know which one you want. Yet, you go through the confusion with a deep discussion on what to choose. Both sides will have what you like and what you don’t, and you start weighing them one by one. Logical animal is what you think you are. But you are just a confused carrot.

Confused reality

Life is an ocean of confusion. Options make us dizzy but those are what we want. Options make us think we are deciding with mind. Filter out the opportunities and pick the best. But there is another machine running within, which already picked the option. You are just weighing out more and more features towards that option to pick it.

This might not be true everywhere. But wherever your emotional energy is needed, it is true. And weirdly, this isn’t about the options themselves, but the deeper meaning within them. Whenever we pick an option to which we need to devote a part of our life, there is a part of us which goes with it. Picking the option which your soul is yearning for is tough. Let me explain it through my own experience.

An Apple Watch story

I always wanted to try Apple Watch. Through watching launch videos, reviews on YouTube and family friends telling how good it is, I always wanted to own one. But, just as my sister was buying it for me, one doubt kept poking from within.

Me being a fan of mechanical-analog watches, will a smart watch with absolutely no soul, which I have to charge everyday, which pings my wrist everytime there’s notification, be a perfect fit? Even through all the contemplation, I got the watch. I even shared these thoughts with one of my friends before getting the watch, but it was just a casual conversation. But, I did enjoy wearing it all the time. After a month, one sleepless night I realised, though I love technology, I don’t like wearing such a lifeless watch. Watching my wrist, I felt it to be so bland. I shared the same with that friend on that night and I clearly remember what reply I got

I remember you sharing the same concern when you were getting the watch. Guess you are just not a smart watch guy, and that’s fine.

I’m thankful to that friend the most. Even today, I know I love smart watches but I also know I don’t like owning one.

Underlying soul

I took the decision of liking a mechanical watch not because of the fact that it is manual, but I like the underlying fact that it had less features and has only one task of telling time; unlike a smart watch with a million features. I like these two different products for two different reasons and now know which to pick.

As I look back, I know every single time I took a good decision, I didn’t filter it through logic but through heart. Does that mean our heart should run our life?

I don’t think so too. However much I like watches, I can’t buy all mechanical watches on this planet making me bankrupt. There is a thin line and I’m finding that line increasingly well with one mantra

Any long term decision is from heart

That worked extremely well starting with my Garmin watch. Though I don’t like a smart watch and it didn’t financially make sense too to buy a fitness watch, that purchase paid off big time by helping me in my fitness journey in the long run. And I’m pretty sure it’ll pay off much better in coming years.

Credit to my friends too in helping me find my line everyday, not by talking from their perspective, but talking sense through my perspective.

I enjoy it

Still, it’s hard. Picking an option with long term goal all the time is a lot harder than what I’ve written. But, I’m liking the process. I like to pick one and go through the internal dialogue of, "Is this what I need". There is always a learning through every choice.

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